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Thursday, 9 June 2011

Hello? Is anybody there?

Sorry about that! I disappeared. Disappeared under a mountain of phone calls and Stuff To Do and clipping hedges and carting stuff to the charity shop and keeping children alive through an entire half term and then ironing.

I haven't read any blogs for weeks. Did anything happen I should know about?

All I have to offer you is Random. So here we go.

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Eldest independently requested The Very Best of Dolly Parton from the library. I love Eldest.

I also love Dolly Parton. There's nothing more satisfying than belting out "IN MY TENNESSEE MOUNTAIN HOME, LIFE IS AS PEACEFUL AS A BABY'S SIGH" at 7.30am when your kids are having a screaming row about their toast.

Littlest says that my voice best suits Islands in the Stream. How she became such an impresario I don't know. Neither do I know how I - the progeny of a music teacher and a highly talented former choirboy - was born with so little musical ability.

It's possible that Littlest thinks I sound like Kenny Rogers.

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There is just So. Much. To. Do. Those days when you feel like you're wading through treacle? Lots of those. In advance of some surgery coming up in the autumn, Eldest's physiotherapy takes up every second waking thought. (Please don't assume that I'm just talking about daytime waking). Exercises. Stretches. Standing frames. Splints. Night splints. Gaiters. Yoga. Nowhere is safe. For example, here is a picture of my child's feet in the cinema:



Not a spacesuit. Though, in the distant past, she has worn something spookily like one.

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I don't know yet if I'm going to watch Camelot. I probably will. But everyone seems far too incredibly pretty. I would have appreciated at least one wart.

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I went on the Special K diet plan, lost 5lbs in a couple of weeks and forgot to even blog about it! And it's Cybermummy this month, and Kelloggs are sponsoring me to go there. I'll do it this weekend. But just to make it quite clear right now - I didn't eat a single bowl of Special K the whole time. People kept asking me about the Special K. Not compulsory, oddly.
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27 comments:

  1. Ali9 June 2011 at 02:38

    A Special K-less special K diet? I'm baffled.

    Have not been near the scales since half-term necessitated much drinking in order to retain cheery disposition. Surely calories in alcohol should not count.

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  2. blackbird9 June 2011 at 02:55

    really.

    no special K?

    intrigued.

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  3. Jen Walshaw9 June 2011 at 04:48

    I have mrs you Mrs Coffee and am looking forward to seeing you. I do not envy you with all the stuff going on with Big, I can imagine it is never far from your mind

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  4. Crayon9 June 2011 at 06:01

    Reminds me of one of my favorite Mommyisms- "If They're Alive at 5:00 I've Done My Job." Glad you're back! Funny coincidence- Miss Dolly lives about a half mile from me. And yay 5lbs!

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  5. The Coffee Lady9 June 2011 at 06:20

    I'm Crayon you serious about Dolly? We're packing a bag.

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  6. Lynn9 June 2011 at 07:11

    Must admit I wondered about the Kenny Rodgers thing, too.

    And like everyone else, I am scratching my head about the Special K diet sans Special K. Must elaborate. In 2013, when you have time.

    Big fat hugs re: the surgery, etc. xoxo

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  7. Anonymous9 June 2011 at 07:46

    5lbs, that's wonderful, well done you. Miss P is a favourite of mine too, take me with you when you go?

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  8. Helen9 June 2011 at 09:22

    Well done on the weight loss although I'm surprised there is any of you left given what you are packing in.
    Thinking of you all re the surgery.xx It will be worth it in the end. xx

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  9. dottycookie9 June 2011 at 09:23

    Well, at least you did make it back to your blog - I haven't even managed that much. And I have nowhere near such good reasons.

    Thinking of you and Eldest re surgery and treatment. You must be shattered - especially since you're clearly not eating properly. No Special K, indeed ;-)

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  10. Johnny9 June 2011 at 10:28

    I don't think you missed too much - oh we did have an armageddon, but so far the afterlife is going pretty well.

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  11. Amy A.9 June 2011 at 11:00

    I love Dolly. I played Truvy in Steel Magnolias and now I want to play everything Dolly has done. (The best little whorehouse in Texas is auditioning... but I don't know if I'm brave enough for that one. :) )

    Also, I wonder if we will get Camelot here. We've just finished Downton Abbey and The Tudors and are anxious for something else good to watch on netflix. :I

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  12. The Coffee Lady9 June 2011 at 11:16

    Ah Helen - if only I was one of those people who lost a bit of weight when stressed. Instead, I just increase my need for wine and chocolate...

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  13. Crayon9 June 2011 at 12:10

    Yes, seriously. Y'all come!

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  14. Anonymous9 June 2011 at 12:23

    Hello! My gosh you've been busy. I am glad you didn't have to eat any special K, and good luck with the surgery --

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  15. The Coffee Lady9 June 2011 at 12:45

    I'm Crayon We're all coming! Don't you worry! I am checking out prices for renting massive great motorhomes!

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  16. driftwood9 June 2011 at 13:28

    of course you didn't eat the special K dear lady, you were far too busy to go on a special shopping trip for it.....

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  17. Crayon10 June 2011 at 07:00

    Yay! We can tool around in it and do a "tour of the gates of country stars' homes" thing! Only fair since I'm actually leaving today to come over to your neck of the woods. (Yes, we say things like that here so git reddy!)

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  18. Pam 11 June 2011 at 13:04

    Well, I'm here but I haven't been for a while.

    You are a hoot. Though clearly everything in your life isn't actually funny.

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  19. Unknown12 June 2011 at 04:20

    I have very fond memories of No 2 belting out 'JOLENE JOLENE JOLEEEEENE' from the back of the car when he was 18mths old.

    Those were the days....

    (more detail of the k-less Special k diet. Intriguing)

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  20. tracy12 June 2011 at 21:35

    Sorry things are so very hard. I hope you get some rest soon. xx

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  21. Loth14 June 2011 at 12:08

    My son told me I sing like a chipmunk. So I think you did pretty well by comparison, no?

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  22. Jane14 June 2011 at 23:05

    Those poor little legs! Guess you'll be relieved when surgery is over...But why I really had to comment is that I just got that exact same Dolly CD, at a garage sale last w/end.
    I read somewhere about a pesky interviewer asking D.P. if her breasts were really hers. She answered, "Sure, I ordered them, and I paid for them"...

    ReplyDelete
  23. The Coffee Lady15 June 2011 at 03:01

    Tracy and Isabelle - thanks so much, you're very kind.

    Jane Dolly is just so cool. I love the story of her responding to a question about whether she still found other men attractive with 'Of course I do - I'm married, not dead'

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  24. Fiona (aka @nlpmum)15 June 2011 at 07:16

    Ha, lovely blog that just sums up being a mum..... flitting from this to that and back again then on to something else with never a thought for self or time to relax or think or do the stuff you feel you need to...... or breath. Ahhhh

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  25. The Coffee Lady15 June 2011 at 07:46

    Oh Fiona - you got that right!

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  26. Jannette16 June 2011 at 14:04

    You lost me on the Special K, but I loooove doing the Kenny Rogers bit. If only I get the chance - I only have to pretend I start singing and I get 3 people shushing me. And I promise I can hold a tune. Sigh. Another thing they never told me about having children.
    Hope there'll be moments of reprieve for you and Eldest in the endless-sounding physio routines.

    ReplyDelete
  27. The Coffee Lady17 June 2011 at 03:19

    Jannette me too! The Kenny Rogers bit is a harmony, right, not just singing lower down. I have crossed swords with Mr Coffee on this one already.

    ReplyDelete

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